Steady Mom

a life lived well

Aren't surprises the best? I had a front-row seat to one last Thursday night, showing up to my Nana's house at midnight (yes, she was still awake!) to be a guest at her 90th birthday party the following day.

My nana raised four kids and has lived through countless ups and some significant downs as well. On this visit I had the chance to ask lots of questions that never occurred to me when I was younger.

What struck me most was realizing that in the big scheme of things--looking back over a long life of 90 years--the petty details of life fade from view, and time gives you a different perspective looking back than you had looking forward.

Extended family often gather at funerals to remember those we love, but this year we had the immense privilege to gather with Nana to celebrate. We had the chance to tell all we appreciate about her while she's still with us.

At her party I read this poem, which reminds me of how my Nana has not only managed to live, but to live so well:

Another Chance
by Helen Steiner Rice

How often we wish for another chance
to make a fresh beginning.
A chance to blot out our mistakes
And change failure into winning.
It does not take a new day
To make a brand new start,
It only takes a deep desire
To try with all our heart.
To live a little better
And to always be forgiving
And to add a little sunshine
To the world in which we're living.
So never give up in despair
And think that you are through,
For there's always a tomorrow
And the hope of starting new.

 

a summertime journey

I'm heading out for the weekend to do some celebrating. Thrilled to be making a (surprise) trip to my Nana's 90th birthday party!

See you back here in a few days - and happy weekending to you, too!

"Father Time is not always a hard parent, and, though he tarries for none of his children, often lays his hand lightly upon those who have used him well;
making them old men and women inexorably enough,
but leaving their hearts and spirits young and in full vigour. 
With such people the grey head is but the impression of the old fellow's hand in giving them his blessing, and every wrinkle but a notch in the quiet calendar of a well-spent life." 
~ Charles Dickens

 

days go by

Last year they pleaded with me to stay for a while. This year, off they run with hardly a glance back. Completely comfortable in their skin--leaving me the one feeling uneasy.

Sometimes I just don't know what to do without my children. Ironically, I often live for these days--for a break. Then when the break comes, I don't quite know what to do with myself!

Ever felt this way? On a regular day, I wake up ready to get to work: to settle squabbles, to teach countless lessons, to prepare meals, to be stretched and lie down and get up and do it again.

This regular rhythm is so beyond me that on a daily basis it's clear how much I have to lean on One stronger. So I do. But give me a day off from that stretching--or a full five days off (the kids were gone from 9-3 each day last week) and it's almost more uncomfortable.

For one, I don't want to like it too much. But the quiet is awfully nice.

For two, I have many other writing projects and work--usually I can get away from what I don't want to do with the excuse that life is too busy with the kids. But when I don't have that excuse? I guess I have to just get to work!

That pull and tug, that stretching, is what makes us mamas.

We bend and adapt, far beyond what we thought possible before we knew this mothering life. Through countless transitions we keep going--becoming women of power, possibility, and endurance--with each day that goes by.

 

"In summer, the song sings itself."
 ~William Carlos Williams

moms making a difference

I was really humbled to be contacted last week by Mom It Forward to be featured in their regular column about moms making a difference.

I do think of myself as someone who is making a difference, but it is often in the daily details of life that this mostly plays out. Wouldn't you say the same?

We may choose a certain course, a certain lifestyle, a certain vision, but eventually we just have to buckle down and get to work. Otherwise the vision stays far off--looking glamourous and inspiring, but unattainable.

We reach a vision, we make a difference, by taking one step--then another--then another. And perhaps this is even more important on the days when it feels as though we seem to be moving backwards instead of forwards. The mom making a difference keeps going, in spite of failures and mistakes.

Making a difference is most of all about the combination of vision and perseverance.

If you'd like to read the kind words from Mom It Forward, head here!